me: & Kevin:

Kevin:  zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

me:  kevin, you are sleep chatting again

Kevin:  huh, wha oh hey there
oddly enough, i woke up at 6:14 this morning, when my
alarm was set for 6, and my snooze alarm goes off every
7 minutesso i hit snooze twice, and don’t remember it

me:  wow
I didn’t set my alarm and woke u 5 minutes before I
had to go run.
damn internal clocks

Kevin:  insanity

me:  I told the surgeon not to put the clock in there.

Kevin:  and why the doctor installed it in your crotch,
we’ll never know
because he’s in jail
for putting clocks in peoples crotches
oh and tax evasion

me:  and I think like 3 parking tickets

Kevin:  what’s up workaholic

me:  NOT WORK
(ok I lied)

Kevin:  ha

me:  how is not-work?

Kevin:  it’s okay

me:  what you been doing?

Kevin:  watching movies, reading, playing wow,
listening to music

me:  god, that sounds fantastic

Kevin:  meh

me:  don’t you meh at me!

Kevin:  i meh specifically at you

me:  I ducked.  It was all matrix and shit

Kevin:  fucking neo

me:  I am so neo that I crap zeros and ones

Kevin:  that doesn’t hurt?

me:  no, not when I use Preparation 01001000

me:  how was listening to your new vinyls?

Kevin:  awesome

me:  like a hot dog?

Kevin:  like two hot dogs

me:  it feels weird to be tweeting again
but in a good way

Kevin:  kind of like shaving your butt
and wearing silk boxers?
NOT THAT I WOULD KNOW WHAT THAT FELT LIKE
HOW DARE YOU EVEN SUGGEST IT

me:  bought a new ipod nano
my old one finally fried on me
hooked it up to charge, and it was burning
hot when I went to pick it up after a few
minutes
 
Kevin:  oh yikes
i need to get a new ipod

me:  doesn’t your current one have a big
crack in it?

Kevin:  no, the backlight is going out
you’re thinking about my butt

me:  oh, right

me:  hypocrisy of the day: Christians broadcast scolding
Muslims for violence in the Koran.  Telling them
they need to edit outdated practices.

Kevin:  ha
burn
but what about that genocidal maniac in the bible?
oh what’s his name
um

me:  God

Kevin:  yeah that one

me:  yeah
he was going through a rough time in his life

Kevin:  wife left him, drug use, alcohol, laid off from work

me:  it’s more common than you think

me:  does my new "bored at work" make sense?

Kevin:  minus the misspelling in the comment
or whatever, yes

me:  it’s a caption

 Kevin:  yes, caption
i knew it was a c word
brain blanked on it

me:  brains gone wild

Kevin:  no, the opposite
brains gone lethargic

me:  yeah, but the other one would sell better

Kevin:  brains gone “OH LOOK A SQUIRREL”

me:  perfect

Kevin:  http://www.uncrate.com/men/gear/ipod-iphone/wall-of-sound/

me:  yeah I saw that thing, ridiculous,
but I would be curious to hear what it
sounds like.
 
Kevin:  what if you had an entire house
of them!!

me:  again ridiculous, but then I wouldn’t
have to pay for my a vibrating bed
or vibrating anything for that matter.
my dreams of vibrating cereal would come
to fruition!
 

Kevin:  ~!@#$%^&*()_+
QWERTYUIOP{}|
ASDFGHJKL:”
ZXCVBNM<>?

me:  yes, but only on weekends

Kevin:  MORNING SUNSHINE

me:  ahhh! you scared me

Kevin:  NO I DIDN’T

me:  Ahhhh!  You did it again
stop that

Kevin:  SORRY
i mean, sorry